After You
by souma no hime
Summary: Akito finally had his way and had Tohru's memory erased. How are the Soumas dealing with this loss? [multi-chaptered thought-fics, second part up]
1. Yuki

AFTER YOU By: Souma no Hime  
  
____ QUICK AUTHOR"S NOTES ON READING THIS FIC Sentences enclosed in double slash [//] are flashbacks and/or thoughts. ____  
  
//"When I lose my memory, please be my friend again."//  
  
She said that when the first threat of memory-erasure surfaced.  
  
//"Ichigo(1)? I love ichigo!"//  
  
Her smile. She used to smile so sweetly, as if she was always very happy. She had carried everything, her deepest depression, our own problems... but she never changed. Even when in our own eyes we see ourselves as freaks of nature, she always had something good to see in us.  
  
Tohru. Tohru-san. Tohru-kun.  
  
I never had the chance to call her by name. Honda-san. Always Honda-san.  
  
How I regret that now.  
  
//"At least I got to see a very cute Honda-san..."//  
  
"Souma-san?"  
  
I looked up and gazed at the blue-green eyes I knew so well. "Yes, Honda- san?"  
  
"Are you all right? The lunch bell sounded 15 minutes ago, but you're still here..."  
  
"No, it's nothing, Thank you."  
  
She left. Part of me wanted to reach out and draw her back. But I can't. We had never been the same to each other, ever since that night when Akito bore down on Hatori and demanded him to erase Honda-san's memory.  
  
//"Please be my friend again."//  
  
Honda-san... Tohru... I wanted to... so much. But Akito...  
  
//"You shall cease to deal with her except strictly as a classmate."//  
  
He leaned his mouth close to my ear, like he did numerous times before. I felt terror paralyzing me. But I wanted to fight. Akito had sensed my rebellion. A sinister smile spread across his face.  
  
//"Do you remember, Yuki? That little room... where I visited you? If news of your re-acquaintance with Tohru reached me, we will relive our memories in that room... in addition, Honda Tohru-san will also suffer..."//  
  
I can't be your friend again. It's for your own good.  
  
That can't be right. If I really wanted to, I could fight.  
  
But in the end, I was just a pathetic coward after all. I hated myself even more. Before, Tohru eased my anger with myself. Her presence assured me that I can be a better person. But how, now? She doesn't even remember the experiences we shared. that night at the Onsen(2), or even the red cap(3).  
  
"Sohma-san, would you like some onigiri(4)?" She appeared again before me. I realized I was still sitting on my desk, my notes scattered.  
  
"Onigiri?" A distant memory.  
  
"Yes. I made some extra ones, expecting Uo-chan and Hana-chan to eat too. But they're in the library, finishing their paper. I guess they can't eat anymore, it's already 5 minutes before our lunch ends." She extended her bento(5) to me. I looked at her, unable to believe.  
  
I must have looked at her for an awfully long time. She began to fluster. "I... I'm sorry. It must have been rude of me to offer you lunch when we're not really that close. You must have been assuming these were poisoned or anything... but the Prince Yuki fanclub would have killed me if..."  
  
"Honda-san..."  
  
Daisuki(6).  
  
It took an enormous amount of restraint not to embrace her right there and then.  
  
"Honda-san... Arigato Gozaimasu(7)..." I took a riceball from her bento and slowly ate it. Swallowing was hard. Tears choked me up.  
  
Please call me Yuki-kun again...  
  
I miss you.  
  
All I really wanted to say was...  
  
I miss you so much...  
  
"Honda-san... would you mind if I walked with you home today?"  
  
"Of course not, Sohma-san! It would be a great honor..."  
  
Tohru.  
  
Even for just this one last time...  
  
.-=+=-. Like it? Hate it? Review it! First Fruits Basket fic! If I get the urge [or if I get enough reviews, whichever comes first] this is going to be just the first chapter. I plan to make a series of 'thought-fics' for each and every member in the Souma family whom Tohru had touched.  
  
DISCLAIMER: No characters belong to me. This fic is not being used for profit. Notes: Ichigo - strawberries [anime episode 4 I think] Onsen - hot springs [anime episode 11 I think] Red cap - a sub-story left out in the anime. Learned of this from various manga translations (SPOILER!!!) It seemed that when Tohru was a child, she got lost in an alley. A boy in a red cap led her back home. Later manga events showed that Yuki was the boy in the red cap. [correct me please if I'm wrong] Onigiri - riceball Bento - lunch box Daisuki - may be translated to I love you. Arigato Gozaimasu - thank you very much 


	2. Kyou

__ QUICK AUTHOR"S NOTES. Sentences/words enclosed in double slash [//] are flashbacks. Words enclosed in asterisks [*] are sound effects. __  
  
*split* *crack* *CRASH!*  
  
Another tree fell down in the forest beside Shigure's house. Numerous trees, in fact, have been viciously felled or split in half.  
  
But it's still not enough.  
  
I continued punching blindly, occasional sounds of cracks piercing my numbed mind.  
  
*POW* This is for that kuso nezumi(1), who didn't have the courage to stand up to that damned Akito.  
  
*BAM* Hatori, for being nothing but Akito's tool.  
  
*WHAM* Akito, for his twisted mins and unreasonable motives.  
  
I punched too hard. My knuckles stung. The tree fell down.  
  
It was Akito all along. If I think of him while practicing, I may end up denuding the whole forest.  
  
//"Right straight!"//  
  
The memory was so clear I seemed to hear her voice once again. Pain seared through me at the thought of her. I caught my head in my hands and kneeled down.  
  
It's not fair.  
  
"Kyoooouu time for supper!" Shigure's voice rang out.  
  
I hated coming back to that house.  
  
I refused to answer, wishing, hoping, Shigure would go away.  
  
That girl.  
  
That stupid girl.  
  
Tohru.  
  
//"Kyo... I'm scared... but..."//  
  
You held on.  
  
Even when I revealed my disgusting true form, you held on to me.  
  
//"You're going to the Onsen with us? I'm so happy! Arigato!"//  
  
Your smile...  
  
//"Maybe it's on you back, Kyo-kun..."//  
  
... always made me feel better...  
  
//"Umeboshi...(2)"//  
  
...even when...  
  
//"I can see it clearly. A wonderful umeboshi on Kyo-kun's back..."//  
  
... I deem myself unworthy.  
  
"Baka neko(3), do you intend to wipe this whole forest off the Souma property map?"  
  
Yuki. Kuso nezumi. I didn't answer.  
  
"You skipped school just so you could kill a couple of defenseless trees?"  
  
Anger overwhelmed me. I moved so quickly even he didn't see it. I grabbed his collar and punched him.  
  
"You have no business interfering with what I want to do!"  
  
I expected his retaliation. His kick sent me flying 5 feet into the air. While I gasped for breath, he straightened his collar and looked at me, his violet eyes flaming.  
  
"If you're angry with yourself, don't take it out on the trees."  
  
"I'm not angry with myself!" But I am. I was so angry because I couldn't stop Akito. I couldn't bring her back. Even when I so badly needed her.  
  
He didn't answer. He only looked at me. I hate it when he does that. He made me feel as if he could read my mind.  
  
"If you have nothing more to say..."  
  
"Honda-san."  
  
What?  
  
"I walked with her home today."  
  
"BAKA NEZUMI!!!(4)" I didn't care if I died when he struck back. All I wanted was to injure him as much as possible. I knew his deal with Akito. I knew each and every odious word Akito spoke. That simple act, if it would reach Akito, would mean that girl's blood... or worse, her life.  
  
I managed to get in a punch in the face. He kicked me on the stomach and I slammed into a tree. Against my will, tears streamed down my eyes. Too weak to move, I only looked up.  
  
To my surprise, the nezumi's eyes were flooded as well.  
  
"Yes, call me selfish. Call me a pathetic coward. But wouldn't you have also given your life just to experience that again? Walking home with Honda- san? Hand in hand?"  
  
He straightened his shirt and walked away.  
  
Tohru.  
  
It has been a week since she agreed to have Hatori erase her memories.  
  
I wanted to feel angry with her because agreed. She didn't have to. I would have happily faced a life of solitary confinement, provided that she remembered me.  
  
But apparently she wouldn't have it.  
  
Tohru.  
  
You idiot.  
  
You beautiful idiot...  
  
.-=+=-. Kyou's part! Waii! I enjoyed doing this. :D Though I'm more of Yukiru, I really enjoyed writing Kyou's possible emotions. Yuki is somewhat cold and unreadable, while Kyou, though unpredictable, is more explosive. It's easier to write explosive characters. I'm afraid Shigure's POV will be hardest to write, though. No, wait. Hatsuharu will be the hardest POV to write. *sigh*  
  
Enough blabber. NOTES: Kuso Nezumi - when translated literally, it means 'shitty mouse', Umeboshi - dried plum often used as stuffing or ingredient in a riceball Baka Neko - stupid cat Baka Nezumi - stupid rat 


End file.
